Back to Basics
On the latest episode (HERE) of Dharma Time, The Dharma Guy & The Dope Doctor talk about getting back to basics.
Disappointment.These keys will help guide us towards a life of more love and compassion while also guiding us away from fear, anger, greed and lust.
1) first key is to always remember that the world we live in is very volatile and doesn't always provide for us in the way we think it should. Therefore, some might say that a part of being human is knowing that a certain aspect of life will always leave us feeling dissatisfied. That's not unique to one person, rather every human on earth experiences this. Meaning no matter how you try to live, there will always be things outside of your control that cause you to feel frustrated, angry, sad and even at times victimized. This isn't a problem or caused by you doing something wrong. It's just life being life and that's ok. Always remember that it's not IF something dissatisfactory will happen, it's WHEN will it happen.
2) Second key is to realize that we create more pain and frustration for ourselves with the thinking that anytime we feel pain or hurt, there is something wrong that needs to be fixed. Trying to make our lives completely perfect and great all of the time can't be done and only causes us to feel more angry, more frustrated, and even like a failure at our inability to accomplish that task. As the first key tells us, those feelings are normal and are a part of this life. Therefore, it would be like trying to push away the floor, it can't be done. Instead of spending our time avoiding the bad feelings or chasing the good ones, we need to learn to accept things the way they are and not the way we want them to be. Acceptance is saying that although I prefer for this situation to be different, I will accept that this is the way it is and simply adapt.
3) The third and possibly most liberating key is that you don't HAVE to feel this way throughout life. Meaning that life doesn't have to involve you constantly taking things personally, running from the bad and chasing the good. There is no need to have such drastic highs and lows in this lifetime. There is a way to approach life with a different perspective that doesn't end in such frustration and anger or sadness. It can be done, but requires a much different perspective. It requires your need to be happy, to be louder than your need to be right.
4) The fourth key to spirituality is knowing that the way to achieve the most skillful perspective is through following and understanding these 12 keys to spirituality. These particular ideals will help you achieve a way of approaching this life that is in more harmony with the reality of life rather than our misguided delusion.
5) This next one falls into two parts. First, understanding that these keys to spirituality are facts and not opinions or just some cool sayings. These keys might not be what we want to think of but, they're undeniable truths of reality. Rather than continually fighting these truths and causing frustration for ourselves we need to surrender to these ideals and live by them. Secondly, we need to understand that our brain is wired a certain way. Whether we are aware or not, our brain is constantly judging everything in our life as positive, negative or neutral. Very simply “I like it”, “I don't like it”, or “I don't care”. This is extremely important to know because it guides our decision making and our impulses all day. Therefore, our untrained decision making (left unchecked) will be based upon our own carnal and material desires.
6) This key also falls into two main components. You need to stop making decisions and acting based upon harmful mindstates such as greed, anger, lust ignorance etc. These motivations cause more frustration, anger and sadness than they prevent. However, you can't simply stop those motivations without also replacing them with more positive and rewarding motivations such as love, compassion, understanding, kindness etc. This basically boils down to making sure that whatever you're about to say and/or do next is coming from a motivation that is going to make your life and everyone else's life more pleasant. Coming from these positive motivations is not only showing the other people love and compassion, but also showing yourself love and compassion. Acting out of negative motivations only cause more suffering for yourself by creating consequences that you don't want.
7) Next is how we choose to communicate. You need to always check to see if the way you're communicating is BOTH truthful AND useful. What this means is whenever you communicate (talking, typing, social media etc) make sure that what you say is keeping within the truth of things, with a special understanding that the truth is 360 degrees. Perspective is owned whereas the actual and complete truth is everyone’s. In other words, the actual truth isn't just your perspective, but everyone's perspective. What is true for you is not always true for everyone. Making sure what you communicate is useful is done by checking to see if it's helpful to the situation/person or not. Sometimes we are overly truthful in an attempt to gain power over another or to belittle them in some way. The truth should always be helpful or kind. We also should refrain from lying in an attempt to keep from hurting. Finally, the most important person to practice this skill with is yourself. Often times we speak to and motivate ourselves in ways we would never speak to anyone else. We need to start speaking to ourselves the way we would a loved one. With love and compassion. Always keep in mind that our perspectives about and within ourselves is not always the truth, rather an opinion coming from a fractured perspective.
8) This next key refers to our actual actions. Our actions need to represent our philosophies. So often our actions in life contradict our own beliefs. Therefore, we need to ensure that before we act we ask ourselves “is this in line with who I want to be” or “will this create more or less suffering in my life”. It's not enough to think about or even say all the right things. We all need to actually do the next right thing.
9) So much of our lives is spent at work that we need to ensure that how we make our living doesn't add to the harm and suffering to the world or to our very own lives. It's extremely difficult to try and walk a spiritual path and reap those rewards while earning a living directly from other's suffering. Therefore our intent while earning a living should come from proper motivation as well.
10) All of these skills require the right amount of balanced effort. Trying to walk the spiritual path and achieve the fulfillment it offers isn't an easy endeavor to be sure, but possible. If we understand that it is an extremely difficult and worthwhile path. Being careful not to put forth so much effort that we become burnt out and discouraged with the pace. In addition, we must put forth enough effort that we are actually striving for better. It's not enough to just think about it or want it badly, we must take the steps everyday to walk a little further down the path of happiness and spiritual fulfillment. We do this through applying these 12 keys of spirituality and checking to see if our actions and thoughts constantly align with these same keys.
11) Without mindfulness this path of spiritual fulfillment would be next to impossible. As humans we have become extremely vigilant when it pertains to the physical world around us, but not so much in the area of feeling tone. That is, do we deem our current experience as pleasant, unpleasant or neutral. Often times we have unknowingly placed a situation into a category of unpleasantness and respond accordingly with a need to fight those feelings. Without first being mindful of how and why we are perceiving a specific situation as positive, negative or neutral we can never then choose to handle it in the most skillful way and are destined to stay in our same old habitual responses that lead us to suffer.To be mindful is to be in the present moment and having a complete present time awareness.
12) Finally, we come to the need to increase our ability to focus on one thing at a time without distraction. That is shutting out all of the constant noise our brains are filled with. We are always taking things personally, thinking of the potential futures or struggling over our past. Meditation is proven to be the best way of ensuring you're in the present moment and maintaining a focused attention. Meditation is an act not to be confused with a skill to be good or bad at. Meditation is but a practice for those situations we encounter that overwhelm us and cause us to respond impulsively. With a mind trained through meditation we can more skilfully navigate those very same situations and choose a well intended response rather than react with intentions that create more suffering for ourselves and everyone else.
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Trinity
aka The Dharma Guy on Dharma Time
DharmaTimeShow@gmail.com